My De-Vices

De-Vices

(My Technology-Related Meltdown)

My cellphone service got cut today, and though it was a mishap that was resolved quickly, I am not proud of the way I handled it. Let me set the tone for a moment. I am on the road, and I lift my phone to my lips and say, “Siri, call McAlister’s.” Normally, Siri knows exactly what to do, and very soon, thanks to my automated personal assistant, I am on the line with one of my favorite restaurants, making a call-in order. But, to paraphrase Aragorn’s famous speech, not this day! I was informed that Siri was no longer available because I had no internet connection. I was perplexed, but I figured it must just be bad service. So, I drove to McAlister’s and tried to make a call, only to hear an automated voice inform me that my service had been temporarily canceled.

Okay. So, what would your response have been? Here’s what I wish mine would have been, “Oh, that’s strange. No problem. I have a vehicle; I’ll just drive home and get the matter cleared up shortly.” Unfortunately, my response was a bit more dramatic. Actually, I have to be painfully honest with all of you. I flipped out. I was somewhat distraught, trying to figure out whom I could blame for this tragedy. I was questioning the providential forces at play and getting genuinely angry that some loser at the cellular company had made a mistake. And that is all it was, a mistake, resolved (somewhat ironically) with a phone call.

Why am I telling you this? Because later, I was driving down the road, and it hit me, I have a problem. My outlandish frustration was utterly ridiculous. What was I actually cut off from during those “precarious” minutes of service-less life? Civilization? Nope. Food, water, or shelter? Nope. My family and friends? I had a car and usable phones all around me in case of an emergency, so nope. The only thing about my day that was actually altered or compromised was the fact that I had to order at the restaurant instead of over the phone and that I couldn’t check Facebook, Twitter, or Google+ while I was waiting for my food. Looking at my response in hindsight makes me feel pathetic.

But think with me for a moment. How many times have you checked your pocket quickly (out of fear), looking for your phone, only to realize you were holding it in your other hand? How many times have you closed a social networking app and then immediately opened it right back up because you had just run out of things to do, not even realizing you had opened the same app? How many times have you reluctantly handed your phone to someone else and kept eyes on that person the entire time he or she had your phone, simply because you didn’t trust him or her with your “personal information?” If any of these scenarios or variations of them apply to you, then I am here to inform you that you are not alone.

I am amazed at just how much value I place on my phone. And it has to stop. I make a public apology to every single person I have ever had personal contact with, where I chose to favor the seductive pull of a cold, lifeless screen over the warmth of personal interaction with you. My name is J.P. Edwards, and I have loved my phone and what it can do more than I have loved you and God. Perhaps not “loved” in the theoretical or emotional sense, but certainly the practical sense. I have given it more of my time. I have protected it fiercely. I have loved it dearly. And (please excuse another Lord of the Rings reference) I have made it “my precious.”

Let it never be said of me that I freak out more over the temporary loss of cell phone service than I do upon hearing that there has been a shooting at a school, or seeing an ambulance at the scene of a wreck, or even hearing my friend say he struggles with depression. I want to be more concerned about the state of the people around me than I am about the state of the thing that is, at it’s core, simply a tool to connect me more deeply to the people around me.

So, here is a little anecdote I jotted down. Take it, or leave it. If you hate it, and it doesn’t help you, just pretend the blog ended at the last sentence of the previous paragraph.

My devices have devised a plan to become vices to me.

Therefore, I must devise a plan to be free of these devices and de-vice myself.